


What he was made of...

by Burningchaos



Category: X-Men (Movieverse)
Genre: Angst, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-05-02
Updated: 2010-05-02
Packaged: 2017-10-09 06:40:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,049
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/84156
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Burningchaos/pseuds/Burningchaos
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John knew what type of man he was. He always had. It was something everyone else needed to figure out.</p>
            </blockquote>





	What he was made of...

**Author's Note:**

> For the Shakespeare quote challenge at [](http://community.livejournal.com/words_fly_up/profile)[**words_fly_up**](http://community.livejournal.com/words_fly_up/). Mine is Having nothing, nothing can he lose from Henry VI part 3
> 
> This fic was originally written in 2007

John watches silently as Marie and Bobby talk. He's never known a chill like the one he feels now. He's never been this cold. Not since his powers came. His stomach is clenching and nausea wells up within him. They are laughing, her small gloved hand in Bobby's larger one.

Hands that had skimmed over his body. Ice cold he'd shivered under their too soft touch, leaving goose bumps in their wake. Hands that he'd loved.

Hands that belonged to her now. Bobby said it wasn't about choosing Marie over him. It wasn't about him being a guy or her being a girl. Bobby wanted to be 'normal'. He wanted a mutant girlfriend he couldn't touch over a mutant boyfriend he could. They were mutants. What was normal about any of this? John wanted to laugh. He could feel the ache of it inside.

John's fingers went white around his lighter. He can feel its smooth edges pressing into his skin. He watches them as they walk further down the garden path. He can feel the bite and scrape of the bark as he drags his hand around the tree that is hiding him. The need to watch his lover drifting further and further away is sick. It's masochistic, and John has never really been into pain. But he'd never been in love before either.

He watches Marie turn her face up toward Bobby's. Her eyes turn down in a parody of flirtation. John had seen this act a thousand times before, done by woman dirtier, more desperate, and hungrier than Marie could ever be. They'd been whores, too. John couldn't help the sneer he knew he was wearing. With each passing moment Bobby was falling deeper and deeper into her web. Smiling, laughing as she tightened it around him.

It was sad. Book-smart, not street-smart, but he'd never thought of Bobby as an idiot. John constantly tried to show Bobby what it was like outside the sugarcoated life he'd had growing up. John told him about the women he had known. Women he was raised around, ones that would kill you for a dollar, or fuck you if you offered them one. He thought he'd succeeded when Bobby said he understood; soft kisses pressed into his skin by always cool lips as the words tumbled from his mouth. Now he knew that Bobby hadn't understood him at all.

Something had to change. Something had to break. If Bobby couldn't see what was right in front of him...John knew he couldn't stay. He wouldn't stay and not be with Bobby; not when Bobby was the only reason he was still here. He wasn't the type of guy who could say 'I'm happy if he's happy'. Either Bobby was with him or he wasn't. Right now, he wasn't.

John started to turn away. He couldn't stand watching anymore. Just as he did, Marie raised her gloved hand and traced a finger across Bobby's lips. Bile rose in his throat, leaving an acidic trail behind it. He would try one more time. Just once more. Then it was over and done. If Bobby wanted out, so be it. John wasn't the type to beg either.

~*~

Scott's car was far from comfortable; especially with people as connected and disconnected as the four of them were. Bobby was sitting next to him, seething over the attention his 'girlfriend' was giving Logan. Logan was so worried about Doctor Grey he barely even spared Marie a second thought after John discovered the 'phone'. John watched her pout and fidget; desperation seeped from her as she tried to regain the center of attention. She never even glanced back at her purloined boyfriend. It was incredibly ironic. It also irritated him. He had lost to a vacuous, unfaithful bitch.

Bobby looks over at him, his expression tight and his normally innocent eyes dark and defiant. It almost seemed as if he were daring John to say something. Anything. He seems to want a reaction. Bobby moves closer, invading his space. He can feel Bobby's cool leg through his thin pants, firmly pressing against his own. Jealousy wasn't an emotion Bobby wore well. He slides closer to the window and watches the telephone poles fly by. Bobby had made his choice, and it wasn't him. He had never been the type to look back.

~*~

They are in the jet again and there is nothing to do other than to watch Bobby and Rouge stare with undisguised longing at the X-Suits. Their expressions sicken him; it's as if the suits are the key to all that is good and righteous in the world. It makes them the perfect minions. They ask about getting theirs, and he watches Marie's expression change as Magneto laughs. Her hated is obvious and amusing. He doesn't say anything he just watches wishing he could ignore them. But he can't.

John looks at Magneto as he plays with his lighter. The grey haired old man is supposed to be the bad guy; he is supposed to be everything the X-Men stand against. John never trusted anyone to make his decisions for him before so why start now. He asks.  
He can feel the older man's gaze measuring him. As if just by looking, he can see what John is made of. Magneto maybe the answer to questions he wasn't ready to ask. The escape his mind was screaming for.

"You are a God among insects. Never let anyone tell you different."

He knows what Magneto is offering, albeit a nonverbal offer. He also knows that this is a one way trip. He knows he can never go back to the mansion if he leaves with them but it didn't matter to him. Not anymore, besides it won't be the first time he's burned his bridges while walking away. This time would be the most spectacular though.

~*~

Wind whips around him as they lifted off. He hates flying but he doesn't want to sit. He wants to watch as his old life is stripped away. It give him a sick sort of joy to know that at least for a little while Bobby will kill himself with guilt.

He knows what he is doing. He always has. It was time everyone else finally realized it.


End file.
